What The Hell Was That About!?!?

The other day I was asked to share my work with the class. Normally I would be absolutely fine with doing this. However this time, this time was different. I don't know why I felt like I did, red faced, sweat beading on my forehead. I could feel the heat radiating off of my face. "Oh god I think I am ... nervous." "Why though?"  I felt like I was in middle school again. My heads clenched my notebook and my eyes locked on my paper, refusing to look up. I was somewhat reserved as a middle school student, but ever since high school I’ve been rather care free, easy going, not overly caring about any one thing in particular. I especially didn’t mind talking in front of people.

 My left leg began to quiver. "What the hell!" "Knock it off" I thought to myself. With this it became increasingly harder to follow my poorly written and scribbled work. As I became increasingly focused on my body my pauses between sentences became longer, awarder and the more I lost what little concentration I had left. "Uggh" this was a feeling all too familiar, I do not know what spurred it. Perhaps it has been awhile since I have done anything of the sort?  Or perhaps an ill-timed anxiety attack? At this point it seems I am just making excuses to myself. As I returned to my seat I reflected on my "performance" and the overwhelming urge to smack forehead into my palm came over me. "God I am dumb" I said to myself while shacking my head. 

Looking back I find the event to be quite humorous on a personal level. However, I wouldn’t mind it if such "humorous" events didn’t occur again. One is enough for now I think. Either way I realize that it’s time to get back to being a big boy and not fret over such trivial things as talking in front of your class mates or have a borderline nervous breakdown in front of them. I can only look forward to my next opportunity to share my work with them... With fingers crossed of course.